23.

living room. I could see little from the top of the stairs but could hear well, and snatches of conversation remain fixed in my memory. "Do the undies fit?" (through supressed laugher) excited me particularly, though at the time I surely did not comprehend why. "How are you managing in the heels?" "You make a very good woman, " and so on. Then my mother sister and their visitor made for the door, and I saw the ob- ject of their mirthful interest, wearing a long black frock of some heavy material, a brunette wig, make-up and gold or silver evening slippers. He also had very long pendant ear- rings, a huge bracelet, and a fur stole over his shoulders. I felt a peculiar excitement within me a warm flushing all over mingled with a fierce curiosity as to how a man could look so much like a lady, I did not see this particular pantomime but the women of the house did and were very thril- led by it judging by their animated chatter about it.

Later on in life, when I was about 16, I went with my parents to a backstage party after the last show, and the cast still had on their costumes and make up. I was fas- cinated by the Dame, a small, "woman's half size" man who was the more restrained type and made a very passable if matronly, female. A member of one of the town's wealth- iest families, his wig and clothes were of fashionable and, for the women there, enviable quality. Most of the time he was surrounded by giggling women but I did see him close up once or twice. He had on a blonde wig, and a white cock- tail frock of fine silk or chiffon with a single halter strap Through the thin material I was thrilled to see the white shoulder straps of two articles of lingerie, bra and slip no doubt. His big bust must have called for a "C" cup bra. The skirt was straight cut but not tight and when he moved I was sure I glimpsed the garters holding up his stockings. He had on elbow length white gloves, and white high heel, ankle strap shoes. I saw that his stocking seams were perfedtly straight and that his legs were smooth, slim and hairless. So stimulated was I that I felt myself blush- ing and looked away for awhile. No man, I've since real- ized, could be fitted so perfectly in female clothing and be so obviously at ease and not be a TV He was retaining feminine mannerisms and stance without a paying audience.